Marmalade and Milk

All i can say is... YUM! I love places that have nice things to look at while we're eating. Wondermilk is by far the prettier. I love that every nook and corner has interesting things to look at, little dinky packages promising pleasant surprises!

Anyway, i had dinner at Marmalade last night and their beef burger was really yummy! You can get a main dish and a drink below RM40, which is i suppose something i only reserve for special occasions nowadays. Must save money for the house, right? Haha, my weakness is for food... and clothes... and random items i like to buy... sigh. I must learn to make my own juicy smoothies, so i don't have to buy them. I love these mint drinks, i think i can grow mint and DIY my drinks.

I'm sure you have noticed by now that this is sortova blind post, done in between calls at work. This post was by far the longest i've ever taken to write a short post.

The story of a pencil abuser to pencil pusher

I love Chipster. Specifically sour cream and onion. That's all i can say. I've just started a new job. I don't know whether i like it yet, but so far it's been good.

In this latest update on what's going on in the land of Erin, I have added two new bags to my collection, strategically placed directly below the eyes, called Louis Vuitton and Prada. And everybody knows, nobody gets rid of them LVs and Pradas.

I have not done any planning for my wedding. Amazingly. I am jampacked with things to do. Out at 7, back at 11 and there's things to do every hour. I like that i have things to do and i'm using up all the hours of the day well but i don't like the utter busyness! I'll have to get cracking soon though, i have to get the invitations sorted by end Jan latest, so that they can go out during CNY.

And what's so funny is just when i got my schedule back to normal goodness again, just when i'm ready to do work and lots of it, my skin decides to act up again. I think its a test. To see if i will continue on in faithful service without complaint in suffering. I think the without complaint bit is a bit hard, but serving on will have to be worked on. Abit hard to operate on low sleep. Anyway, we'll see how things go. Must keep filling my mind with Gospel goodness to keep me holding on. Pray for me, you all.

Ahh hectic nyer is my life. It's a never ending one thing after another. It will never be boring, that's for sure. I think it was about this time last year that i started wishing i had a holiday... Still haven't had one, but i'm definitely looking forward to a long week away from everything next year, but that's a couple of months away still.

This weekend is really full! Don't forget to come buy books off me tomorrow at the Big Book Sale in Palate Palette! I'm so busy dusting and packing my three boxes full of books to get rid of. Glad i'm getting rid of them though, i've been trying to pack up all my stuff in my tiny room so that i'd be ready to move out as soon as Adrian and i get a house. I can't believe i have so much crammed into my room! So much i don't need or want! I'm getting rid of clothes too, hopefully somewhere somehow. I'm Zen minimizing, reducing my life to boxes.

Next week is a new week, and the busyness continues.

Clean up sharp

Book this date : December 6, 2009 if you like to read books with covers so embarrassing, you won't be able to read it in public. I am clearing out my shelves and bringing my stock of books to this event. I'm hoping i will get rid of all the books and perhaps garner a little bit of money, as am running short and no job just yet. All ranging from RM1-20 max! If you're lucky, you might even catch some art pieces from me. Come even if you don't want to buy books! Palate Palette has amazing food... yums!

I know it's super humongous, but i love it!

The marriage ceremony

I haven't done anything for my wedding (researching pretty pictures doesn't count) since confirming all the locations. And i'm so happy about that! I'd like to think there's more to my life at this point other than THE WEDDING. So after feeling guilty that i should have been doing more for my wedding, and subsequently feeling guilty that i was feeling guilty cos i shouldn't have been feeling guilty since all the busyness stopping me from doing my wedding was mostly church time or people time or God time. Anyway, since i have a little more time to myself now, it's a good time to think about the wedding.

The next coupla things on my list now, is the ceremony program and finalizing the guest list. One more important than the other. People who get cut off from the guest list or not will live (despite the inevitable grumbling, yes they will live) past my wedding, but the ones who attend hopefully don't miss the message in the ceremony. So we turn to the faithful work of the English Reformer, Thomas Cranmer who wrote and compiled the Book of Common Prayer. The solemnization of matrimony seems to be good enough, although i think we will be not using it lock stock and barrel. This is the 1662 version, not the current one available in our local churches.

Here i highlight something interesting that i never thought about before til i heard Philip Jensen's Love, Sex and Marriage series of sermons. The following is taken from the BCP1662:

If no impediment be alleged, then shall the Curate say unto the Man, WILT thou have this woman to thy wedded wife, to live together after God's ordinance in the holy estate of Matrimony? Wilt thou love her, comfort her, honour, and keep her in sickness and in health; and, forsaking all other, keep thee only unto her, so long as ye both shall live?
The Man shall answer, I will. 
Then shall the Priest say unto the Woman, WILT thou have this man to thy wedded husband, to live together after God's ordinance in the holy estate of Matrimony? Wilt thou obey him, and serve him, love, honour, and keep him in sickness and in health; and, forsaking all other, keep thee only unto him, so long as ye both shall live?
The Woman shall answer, I will.

Did you know that nowadays it is commonly asked as "Do you take this woman..." and replied with "I do"?
But in the wedding ceremony, you don't ask the couple to say "I do", you ask them to say "I will".

Paraphrasing Philip Jensen from Love,Sex and Marriage,

"There's a world of difference between saying  "Do you love her?" and "Will you love her?" (On your wedding day) Do you love her is not the question, every man in the room loves her, she's dressed up beautiful, everyone loves her that day. The question is the old Beatles question, "Will you still love me when i'm 64?" Marriage is made of that commitment to WILL to love one another."

Now, this wasn't a show of my obsession with accuracy. This is a show of things we all glaze over without considering the meaning in all the things that we do, without caring whether our wedding day glorifies God. It's sad that we don't remember God on the second best day of our lives. How can we presume to remember him on the worst day? Everyone cares about the dress, the flowers, the beauty of it all, the darned guests... who cares about God? Who cares what God's saying in the sermon, as long as the preacher keeps it short? Who cares how much skin the bridesmaids are showing, as long as they all look good in pictures together? Who cares whether the locations are good for preaching, as long as it looks grand and our guests will not think we're el cheapo mondo?

Battling against sexual immorality

by Motte Brown on the YoungMarriedLifeBlog. A helpful short article for the benefit of the men i know and love, AND the women i know and love... and myself.

I really appreciate this bit of wisdom from Jon Bloom from Desiring God blog about fighting for purity:

It's very important that we count the cost of sexual immorality before temptation hits. That's the time for clear thinking. Temptation clouds our judgment. That's why we pray "keep us from temptation." Avoiding the fog by steering around it is much better than trying to navigate through it.

Bloom goes on to reference a list Randy Alcorn made 25 years ago as a young pastor detailing for himself the consequences of adultery. It's his way of "steering around" sexual temptations before they happen. Alcorn writes that he reads the list when traveling or feeling vulnerable. Here's a portion of the list:

• Grieving my Lord; displeasing the One whose opinion most matters.
• Loss of reward and commendation from God.
• Having to one day look Jesus in the face at the judgment seat and give an account of why I did it. Forcing God to discipline me in various ways.
• Suffering of innocent people around me who would get hit by my shrapnel (a la Achan).
• Guilt awfully hard to shake—even though God would forgive me, would I forgive myself?
• Plaguing memories and flashbacks that could taint future intimacy with my wife.
• Bringing great pleasure to Satan, the Enemy of God.
• Heaping judgment and endless problems on the person I would have committed [sexual immorality] with.
• Possible diseases that could affect your health and the health of your spouse.
• Possible pregnancy, with its personal and financial implications.
• Loss of self-respect, discrediting my own name, and invoking shame and lifelong embarrassment upon myself.

It's also helpful to remember the positive practical effects from this list such as guiltless ministry impact and uninhibited intimacy with your wife. Obeying God is better for you in real ways.

Twilight

I don't claim to be a die-hard fan, cos the many words in those books don't mean much to me, but surprisingly, i enjoyed it even though i didn't expect to. Many a better written book i have read, but this was interesting. Being a fan of the Twilight series as i am, of course i'll read articles and articles about it and i came across this interesting quote that i have to put up:

Edward's insistence on marriage, although initially resisted by Bella, soon becomes attractive to her. (It's basically what she wants, anyway—eternity with Edward by her side in an exclusive monogamous relationship; it's just she had trouble shaking the stigma that comes with getting married so young. Society thinks there's something wrong with you, and that young marriage is foolish; you ought to see the world and live your life first, or some such nonsense—as if life ends when you get married.

Taken from here.

Pretty maids all in a row

Hello bridesmaids! More eye candy for you:

This raps me

I'm not a big fan of rap, but this is worth listening to.



Lyrics after the jump.

Read more...

Married in God's Eyes

by Suzanne Hadley Gosselin

Not too long ago, I read on the front cover of a Christian college newspaper about a couple who had made their own marriage commitment, spur of the moment, by themselves, on a beach. They told friends and relatives about it later, after they'd secured a marriage license. The couple's justification for their seeming indiscretion was that they were "married in the eyes of the Lord."

Something about this article really troubled me. I suppose you could make a case that the couple had physically made a covenant before God by consummating their relationship. But, to me (and I'm guessing to their family and friends), it appeared to be a lack of self-control. In his article, "Is Living Together Really a Big Deal?" author Ed Gungor makes a similar observation:

Most of us know people who are in love, plan to marry and currently live together. It’s sort of the new premarital counseling program. I visited a church out West that had a “pre-marriage” ceremony for a couple living together. No license. No wedding dress. Just a prayer of blessing to hold them over until the couple walked down the aisle—a kind of marital “appetizer,” I guess. I asked the pastor why they did it. He said, “The couple believes they are married in the eyes of the Lord, and we just wanted them to feel affirmation in our community.”

What did I think about it? I was bummed about it. I actually believe that marriage needs to be public and people need to vow into it in front of those who matter to them—it’s not just a private matter in front of the Lord. Truth is, those who declare they are married “in God’s eyes” seem to reframe their claim when they break up with their live-in partner. Then they claim they were never “really married.” This makes me very dubious about the “married in the eyes of the Lord” doctrine.

Gungor gives one of the best explanations I've ever heard of the emotional and psychological reasons sex should be saved for marriage. Beyond that, he reaffirms the value of a public demonstration of marriage:

If a Christian couple loves each other enough to jump in the hay, I think they should get married in the eyes of God and the rest of us. Marriage is not a private sacrament; it impacts the whole community of faith. It’s the right thing to do, and disciples do the right thing. They don’t just live on love—emotions, feelings and hormones—they live on principles, beliefs and disciplines that develop character. Pagans (and children) only live for themselves—they live for the “now” and feelings alone.

There were moments during our engagement when my now-husband and I had to remind ourselves of the importance of self-control and living above reproach in the courtship process. And it came down to what Gungor expresses here: "Disciples do the right thing." We may be tempted to find loopholes, but in the end it is gratifying and beneficial ... and just plain right ... to follow God's way.

Marrying young is not the issue

For as much as i'd like to say we aren't doing anything wrong by marrying young, the point in our decision to get married ain't just cos we're young, hot for each other and can't wait. The whole point of marriage is so structurally forged to the image of Christ and the church, you can't separate it. And it's got nothing to do with age, race or how much money you have in your bank account. It's all about service to the Husband who serves his Church. We are seeking to serve Him, together in marriage.

That doesn't mean that every tom, dick and harry who thinks 'Oh sure i'd like to serve God like that, lets me go gets a wifey and get goin on that,' should go ahead and get married. We thought long and hard before we decided to get married. It was not a spur of the moment decision, it had been boiling around for a long time. We talked to a lot of people, married people older and wiser than us. And sometimes it's absolutely necessary that people question young people about these kind of decisions! As we all know, sometimes young people do stupid things. It's indeed a loving and caring reaction to something that may be a rash, sudden, wilful kind of jumping the gun. Older people should feel a responsibility towards helping younger ones make good marriages.

There's a whole lot that young people need to know about getting married. It isn't as easy as it seems, just a simple signing of paper. It's a responsibility. It's also a commitment to reflect the divine marriage image. It doesn't guarantee a happy-ever-after. And no one is THE ONE anymore after a few months of knowing them within a marriage. Although we do encourage being unafraid of service and responsibility, we're not hoping to inspire people to jump the gun and into marriage blinded by young love.

I only hope those who read about us and know us, won't use us as an excuse for getting married suddenly and rashly. Know that we are being held accountable to a lot of people, namely our pastor and his wife, our church and our families and friends. We answer to them, as they care for us and teach us and help us stay married. We will continually grow under their supervision. It's not just a between me and you kind of thing. It's not even a just between us and God thing. Marriage is a community thing.

So think twice. Thrice. Whatever is more than four times.