Sunday, March 16, 2008

Just on a Sunday

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As i walk down the street, the stares i get confuse me. Why? What are they looking at? They seem to be looking in my direction? Do i know them? Do they know me? What is it exactly are they staring at?
I twirl a strand of my blue hair nervously, my self-consciousness is telling. I chew on my lower lip, feeling the stud move in place. Is there something wrong? Do i have a piece of food stuck between my teeth?
The colorful outfit i have on doesn’t improve my mood. I purposely chose it because i woke up feeling happy, like all the world is well and i have not a care. They’re whispering now, what are they talking about? Is there something wrong with me?
A cupcake in the window of a shop captures my attention and i stare at it eagerly, rummaging in my messenger bag for my money. I can almost taste the gooey yumminess. Why is the shopkeeper staring at me like that? Hey! She’s taken that cupcake. It was the very last one! Hmm, someone inside must have bought it, i guess.
Then i feel a tug on my multicolored hoodie and i turn to see a small girl looking up at me. I smile and reach out a hand to shake hers, but her mum quickly tugs her away. I can hear her saying, "Now honey, what did i tell you? You don’t talk to strangers. They could be dangerous, especially weird ones like that." Am i weird? Am i dangerous? That’s preposterous! She doesn’t even know me! How can she think such things about me when she doesn’t even know me?
I stomp off indignantly, feeling the wind tugging my hair, i was walking so angrily. It is so unfair. People judge me by what i look like, by what i wear… They don’t even know the very person i am -my character, my personality, what i’m like - but they assume that since i appear this way, i am strange, weird, dangerous…

Friday, March 07, 2008

random rant?

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I can’t believe it. Call me weird but i think it’s weird to be courting at 17 (Courting as in context of Boy meets Girl - by Josh Harris). I don’t know. I’m 20 and i can’t imagine dating in light of marriage NOW. Yeah yeah, you can tell me about all the people in other countries that are married and have kids by 17, before 17, but whatever. At least in this country. Anyway, i don’t deny that some people are more mature than others at that age, but in general, well just look at our 17 year olds right here in Malaysia.
Think about it. At 17, what are we doing? We are in Form5, where main priority in life : studies (Okay, this is on the assumption that God is first no matter what). How are we anywhere prepared to get married, support that and raise a family? Sigh. I don’t know. Maybe God prepares. Maybe sometimes we need to be thrown into the deep end of the pool to learn.