Saturday, November 14, 2009

Marrying young is not the issue

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For as much as i'd like to say we aren't doing anything wrong by marrying young, the point in our decision to get married ain't just cos we're young, hot for each other and can't wait. The whole point of marriage is so structurally forged to the image of Christ and the church, you can't separate it. And it's got nothing to do with age, race or how much money you have in your bank account. It's all about service to the Husband who serves his Church. We are seeking to serve Him, together in marriage.

That doesn't mean that every tom, dick and harry who thinks 'Oh sure i'd like to serve God like that, lets me go gets a wifey and get goin on that,' should go ahead and get married. We thought long and hard before we decided to get married. It was not a spur of the moment decision, it had been boiling around for a long time. We talked to a lot of people, married people older and wiser than us. And sometimes it's absolutely necessary that people question young people about these kind of decisions! As we all know, sometimes young people do stupid things. It's indeed a loving and caring reaction to something that may be a rash, sudden, wilful kind of jumping the gun. Older people should feel a responsibility towards helping younger ones make good marriages.

There's a whole lot that young people need to know about getting married. It isn't as easy as it seems, just a simple signing of paper. It's a responsibility. It's also a commitment to reflect the divine marriage image. It doesn't guarantee a happy-ever-after. And no one is THE ONE anymore after a few months of knowing them within a marriage. Although we do encourage being unafraid of service and responsibility, we're not hoping to inspire people to jump the gun and into marriage blinded by young love.

I only hope those who read about us and know us, won't use us as an excuse for getting married suddenly and rashly. Know that we are being held accountable to a lot of people, namely our pastor and his wife, our church and our families and friends. We answer to them, as they care for us and teach us and help us stay married. We will continually grow under their supervision. It's not just a between me and you kind of thing. It's not even a just between us and God thing. Marriage is a community thing.

So think twice. Thrice. Whatever is more than four times.


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