making food for everyone makes me happy

but only once in a while. Today i mixed spaghetti with garlic, onions, capsicum, ham and mushrooms with a generous dollop of rosemary olive oil and herbs. Added baked tomatoes to that and topped it all off with a healthy strawberry yogurt with shortbread. Yums! I also tried a tea infusion with my new pot today : Lemon and Mint tea. My husband very lovingly ate and drank it all up and said it was good. I don't know whether he's encouraging me or ENCOURAGING me. But it's okay. I ate it too. Nobody died yet.

envy

sometimes i envy jerome's freedom, but in all honesty, i don't think i can handle it. sitting here trying my best to concentrate on sorting out all the art dept stuff that has gone wonky since my 3 month break. Having to move all my stuff as well, in light of moving into the new house soon, is not helping. Housework looks so much more attractive these days. That said, its not like I'm home that often to do them nowadays. I don't like being a nomad, it might be a girl thing to want to have a permanent place to stay. It's too unsettling.

tonight's gonna be a good night!
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Why Your Church Doesn't Feel Like A Family

It's a new year

It's that time again, to thank God for another year lived on earth, doing His work and pray for more to come. So many changes has happened since the last year. I got married, started working, moved with the church into the new building, and on and on and on. It's a really happy birthday this year, after the streak of unhappy birthdays stopped in 2009. And it's really funny too, cos it's not any special-er today than yesterday or the day to come. No big celebration, no party. Just any old day, me in my pyjamas sitting in front of my computer doing artwork.

What did i wish for as i blew out the candles this year? I usually don't wish on the birthday candle, i don't believe in wishing for anything like that but this year, well, it was different. I wished that God would bless us with a baby. I'm in no rush, given i'm only 23, but yeah, i'd love to have one of God's little creatures. Then, a thought came to me, thinking that yeah, i am ONLY 23, what do i know about caring for babies! So in the end, i wished for God to prepare me for a baby. Do you think that wish will be granted?

sometimes typing is easier

Adrian has been lavishing gifts on me for my birthday. First, a Zee Avi cd which i've been gushing over a while now and now a Wacom Bamboo Pen tablet! I've been yearning for one ever since i did the little comic for CERC camp in 2009. It's so helpful, still taking some getting used to, but overall it's great! Can't wait to churn out more lovelies with this thing. I'm practicing by inking a tiger, but i've not got very far. Very rusty now.

while sipping mint coffee...

I watch my little plants grow everyday, and it's just lovely, although i started off with four and now only two are successfully growing. I tried to grow dill and sweet marjoram but i have found that they don't take very well to our weather. Parsley is doing really well and my mint, well i just bought it in a ready pot from a nursery. It's amazing! I see the hand of God more and more in the sustenance of this earth, as i, a mere human, cannot compel my favourite herbs to grow no matter how much i water, fertilize or provide a sunny spot. It just wasn't intended to grow here. God planned for it to grow elsewhere and only there will it grow. So profound, so awesome! God is great!

I was reading this article called "Taming the tongue" on Boundless, re-reading actually and this short line popped up at me. 

Simply having the freedom to do a thing doesn't justify doing it. Being able to discipline oneself for the benefit of others is the very essence of maturity.

It's mainly referring to people using the freedom of speech to justify using colorful words in speech, where the article promotes taming the tongue because "To fear the LORD is to hate evil; I hate pride and arrogance, evil behavior and perverse speech. (Proverbs 8:13)" and also "Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult, but with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing. For whoever would love life and see good days must keep his tongue from evil and his lips from deceitful speech. He must turn from evil and do good; he must seek peace and pursue it. (1 Peter 3:9-11)" And of course : The tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole person, sets the whole course of his life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell. (James 3:6).


But i think it applies to most other things we do that's not only harmful to self and people around us, but most importantly that's displeasing to God and an ungrateful expression towards to the grace God has already shown us. It reminds me of Galatians 5 which says : 

For freedom Christ has set us free; stand firm therefore, and do not submit again to a yoke of slavery. 

For you were called to freedom, brothers. Only do not use your freedom as an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another. 

But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. For the desires of the flesh are against the Spirit, and the desires of the Spirit are against the flesh, for these are opposed to each other, to keep you from doing the things you want to do. But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law. Now the works of the flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, envy, drunkenness, orgies, and things like these. I warn you, as I warned you before, that those who do such things will not inherit the kingdom of God. But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. And those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires.

And another aspect that you find in Galatians is the loving service to the brothers expressed in the fruit of the Spirit (also 5:13-14) versus gratifying the flesh which evidences the list above. You see how your own godliness is tied in to the church's godliness as well. Because Jesus came to save his church, a motley crue of undeserving sinners, all of us. Not just individuals. Lone rangers are dead rangers, says Josh Harris in his book 'Sex is not the problem; Lust is'. And, through working through the book with the girls, i can see how it all works out, how my own godliness is tied into everyone else in church as well, how my own 'tiny' sins affect the others. I certainly don't want anyone else to be stumbled because of me. 

No better words describe it

Now this I say and testify in the Lord,  that you must no longer walk as the Gentiles do, in the futility of their minds.  They are darkened in their understanding,  alienated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them, due to their hardness of heart. They have become callous and  have given themselves up to sensuality, greedy to practice every kind of impurity. But that is not the way you learned Christ!— assuming that you have heard about him and were taught in him, as the truth is in Jesus,  to  put off your old self, which belongs to your former manner of life and is corrupt through  deceitful desires, and to be renewed in the spirit of your minds, and to put on the new self, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness.

Let no one say when he is tempted, “I am being tempted by God,” for God cannot be tempted with evil, and he himself tempts no one. But each person is tempted when he is lured and enticed by his own desire.Then desire  when it has conceived gives birth to sin, and sin when it is fully grown brings forth death.

For the grace of God  has appeared, bringing salvation  for all people, training us to renounce ungodliness and  worldly passions, and  to live self-controlled, upright, and godly lives in the present age,  waiting for our blessed hope, the appearing of the glory of our great  God and Savior Jesus Christ, who gave himself for us to redeem us from all lawlessness and to purify for himself a people for his own possession who are zealous for good works.

{Ephesians 4, James 1, Titus 2}

Whole on, please!

Me : Where are you calling from, ma'am?

Person : From Perak.

Me : Are you calling from a company, a shop...?

Person : Calling from Perak.

Me : Yes, ma'am... (start to enunciate slowly) ARE... YOU...CALLING...FROM...A...SHOP? OR...A...MINIMARKET?

Person : Oh, from trading company.

Me : Ah! A wholesaler, yes?

Person : Okay.

Me : -.-" (i said wholesaler, not hold on please).

Celebrating with shrimp

After a good married month, Adrian took me out on a celebratory date yesterday. I didn't quite like the place we went to, which was Bubba Gump, but it was a fun night. I had already interviewed him a couple of days earlier with questions like, "What weird things have you discovered about your wife in this month?", "What things have you learnt to serve your wife?", and "What things have you discovered about yourself in this month?". I laugh in my sleep at funny things that i dream about - that's quite weird. I've a voracious appetite for life - he tries his best to keep up =P *kidding honey!*. He has discovered that marriage is hard work for selfish people - he's working very hard at this marriage. At Bubba's, i told him that i've learnt that it's hard to remember that you are one now, there's no such thing as "i'm still single sometimes" or "i need some alone time right now". It's you and me, til death do us part.

The Obsessive Bride

I'm glad i was known as an obsessive bride. I wasn't obsessive over all sorts of little details, i really wasn't all that concerned. I was obsessive over the prices, i said no to a lot of expenditure that might have been. If i hadn't had interfered, i think everyone might have just spent whatever they liked on everything. Crazies. But there's only one thing i'm really happy i was obsessive over, which is the content and flow of the ceremony.

If there's anything any bride should be obsessive over, it should be that. I'm glad our ceremony told the story that it did about our lives together, joined by God, for Christ, his Church and the Gospel. I'm glad that cos of our obsession over that, people could see the statement we're making with our lives. I'm very glad to have put it all out there, for you all my friends and family, because we want to share with you this good life we have, this salvation that we have under Christ.

I just wanted to encourage all you young bride-to-bes to be godly when deciding how to have your wedding. Encourage the people around you to make godly decisions too, like not overspending, or over-anything. I wasn't happy how some things were done, but well, some things i had no choice but to close one eye and let it go. If i had a chance for a do-over, i would have done a lot more things myself. Even though that would have meant a lot more tiredness for me, i would have liked to maintain more control over the expenses incurred and other things. Not everyone shares the same mentality that weddings can be budget, gorgeous and meaningful at the same time. So struggle with it.