I am deeply troubled. I can't sleep, because it is when my mind is idle where troubling thoughts come piling into my mind.
I'm afraid i have no one to tell about my troubles. The blog is too public, some friends do not keep secrets and some i have worn out with many nights of telling these things. Old problems that become new, new problems that are getting old...
I haven't had a night like this for a long time. It seems that it only hits me when i am not expecting it.
I was unnecessarily mean to someone today. Really mean. And the poor thing was only in the line of fire. I needed somewhere to rant and convey some anger, and so i really gave it to this particular person. *although a small part of me still thinks that it was well deserved and was long time coming*
I was also wondering who is that damned fool who said, 'Tis better to have loved and lost than to not have loved at all."? Seriously. Cos i'd rather not have loved at all. I do. Really.
Sigh.
I'm afraid i have no one to tell about my troubles. The blog is too public, some friends do not keep secrets and some i have worn out with many nights of telling these things. Old problems that become new, new problems that are getting old...
I haven't had a night like this for a long time. It seems that it only hits me when i am not expecting it.
I was unnecessarily mean to someone today. Really mean. And the poor thing was only in the line of fire. I needed somewhere to rant and convey some anger, and so i really gave it to this particular person. *although a small part of me still thinks that it was well deserved and was long time coming*
I was also wondering who is that damned fool who said, 'Tis better to have loved and lost than to not have loved at all."? Seriously. Cos i'd rather not have loved at all. I do. Really.
Sigh.
hey, babe. i couldn't help but concur abt the "i wish i had never loved at all" part. well....it sucks. but i guess time heals all wounds, huh? but i can only hope that you'll feel the joys of love again someday. =)
ReplyDeletei must admit i do feel kinda bad for whoever it was that was in the line of fire. and i don't even know what happened! hehehe.
go easy, girl. ppl could be physically and emotionally damaged. (and you know this, btw).
heheh. hey, check out my new blog, ok?
=P kena self-promo sikit.
love.