Monday, September 19, 2011

The dog days were gone for like... 5 minutes?

1 comment
And they're back.

These four months have been a record for many things:
The most we've ever talked about real and important things since the beginning.
The most honest we've ever been about everything.
The most time i've had to practice cooking and have a few steady recipes under my wing.
The most relaxed time i've had to actually sit down and think.
The most difficult work of sanctification.
The most amount of tears ever shed.
And so on and so forth.

I wouldn't have given up these three months for anything.

I've learnt many things, which may surprise many, but i don't care.
I've learnt that in many ways, i am sinful, and of whatever sins i know of, i will repent. But also that, i cannot repent of things that is not a sin. Or at least, i'm not convinced that it is.
I've also learnt that you REALLY can't trust people. People misunderstand what you say or do, take what you say and do and use it against you. So i've got to learn to open up to people in a clear way, always clarifying and asking why. And expecting them to betray you anyway.
I've learnt not to expect apologies. Cos people are sinful. They don't know what they did, and sometimes even if they know, they're not sorry anyway. So i've got to tell them what they did, expect an apology and not be surprised if there isn't any.
And lastly, i've learnt that running away isn't going to help. It's only going to be a repeat of the same situations in a new place with new people. Sticking and sorting is the way to go, although i have also found it to be painful and angering and upsetting. Easier to take flight, but no solving the matter then.

So all in all, i learnt that i am sinful, people are sinful, but we still have to live with one another. Welcome to what is called the church.

1 comment :

  1. Dear sister,

    I am so very encouraged when I read your blog. I get scared when I think of the sanctification each of us must go through, and I think I somewhat still deny such a necessity. I still cannot go to God and say, okay, just whack me. Cz I'm so darn afraid of being whacked and having my soul be crushed by God and reshaped. But thank you for being honest, and for staying to fight through. It has been a great encouragement to me and an example of perseverance that I myself have yet to learn. Perhaps God will bring it soon, before I am ready to handle it, as he always does, knowing what is best for me.

    Loves. Thank you for loving Christ and his church. :) Have a good day sister!