the last post

I actually honestly don't know why i expect sinful people to behave in any other way than sinful. It's almost as though i try to believe in the best of people -even myself, which i know for a fact doesn't exist outside of the redemption by Jesus Christ for his holy people. Because the best of people is Jesus Christ.

So i figure my last post is unjustified.

But, all these emotional stuff is getting me down. I'm just really tired of being with people cos people make me unhappy. I'd really just rather curl up, under my blanket and sleep. ALONE. I would love to be a happy bride but that seems very elusive.

I have an unhelpful but true motto to life : If you want things done right, do it yourself.
It's true. Especially from recent events. But i think if you want things done right, even you can't do it yourself.

But anyway, in some specific cases, i think that motto works just fine =)

trying me

I'm so sick of people who dismiss frugal as cheap and tacky, think of creative innovation as weird and nobody-will-like-that, and comment on different ideas as eeyer-nobody-does-that and won't-look-nice-lar.

A question i'd like to ask is, are you the designer or am i?
Nuff said.

the world today has no appreciation for gospel values. not surprising. What's surprising is even Christians think this way. No appreciation for holiness. Marriage is merely something else in life, not related to the gospel and therefore you should just follow the world's standards. Why can't people praise the desire to remain holy before marriage by getting married? Why do people praise the pursuit of more money to achieve a certain expected standard of living and security instead of pursuing holiness? don't you all understand that we don't need to live in a big place with a big car and big bank accounts to start off with? What is wrong with renting a small place, with small cars and small pay? As long as we don't starve to death isn't it... Why do people think of marriage like an end to life? As if i won't have a life after the deed is done. For crying out loud. It's just ridiculous. that is why so many Christians fall into sexual sin before they're married. And what do people do? close one eye, they get married eventually don't they? When they can afford it wat... the whopping big wedding.

Sigh. That is the ugly raincloud that shadows my wedding. That is the worst that weddings bring out in people. If there were any good reason to elope, this comes close.

it's the forty niner.

My ring has no diamonds. My invitations were printed on my printer. My dress is hand made. My make up will be self done. What's more important? I'm marrying a good Christian man and we want to honor God with our lives together by being holy and gospel focused in everything we do.

My friends, flee from things that drag you away from Christ. Flee from things that distract you, color your perspective, entice you subtly. When man becomes your Lord rather than Christ, flee. When money becomes your Lord rather than Christ, flee. When your brother or mother or friend becomes your Lord rather than Christ, flee. There's only one God, one Lord. Only One, who's worthy of our wholehearted devotion and love. Only One who has saved us from these idols. Only One who asks us to follow Him, to take up our cross and suffer. And be blessed.

Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be satisfied. Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness' sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.Blessed are you when others revile you and persecute you and utter all kinds of evil against you falsely on my account. Rejoice and be glad, for your reward is great in heaven, for so they persecuted the prophets who were before you.

Lima puluh hari lagi

There are so many things yet to be done and it's only 50 days more. I hope to finish my dress drafts this weekend so i can start on the real thing first week of March. We didn't start our marriage prep as planned last week, but we are doing the first one this Friday. We did however did this personality slash relationship assessment questionnaire which ended up quite weird. One thing to improve : definitely communication. And i think the questionnaire helped us identify areas we need to talk about or watch out for.

There's also the looming deadline for the house. We hope to move in as soon as we can to fix up the place, but i think that might be difficult. *stay positive!* Right now, it's just fun going shopping together for things we'll need for the house. It makes it almost real, like we're sooo close! It is a slight reality check too, cos things seem to be so expensive and we have to watch everything we spend on. I'm a regular old coupon cutter now, but i guess that's just the natural thing to do in spending our money wisely.

I can't believe we've reached the 50 day mark! FIFTY DAYS! That's crazy short! I just can't wait! Anticipation excitement nervousness all building up now!

We've also done our ceremony program. Well, almost done. But no reveals here, you'll just have to come and attend the ceremony to see what's gonna happen =P

fifty two days and here's what my sister's gonna wear

They're so gorgeous!

pesëdhjetë e tre ditë më shumë

It has been an interesting Chinese New Year. I guess it's almost like my first attempt of giving out red packets, albeit a little more brown than red. I gave out most of my family's side wedding invitations. Never realized how many family feuds there were, i'm just happy to turn up and eat and celebrate anywhere. It's nice to catch up with some relatives after not seeing them for a long time. I only see some of them just once a year during this season and since my grandma's condition got worse, we stopped going visiting everywhere.

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I made dinner for church today with Adrian. I really enjoyed cooking with him! It made it all so much fun in the kitchen, especially since i don't like cooking and i was really nervous cos it was a new recipe i had just gotten off the net this very morning. I also have never cooked for so many people before, i've previously just bought everything! Adrian's so encouraging. A very willing guinea pig. Made the food taste all the more yummy cos he was completely involved and hands on. The very best husband anyone could find.

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A couple of days ago it was the much commercialized celebration of love. I have no problems celebrating that! I'm all for good Godly love within marriage. Adrian was very thoughtful, i had been cellotaping my shoes together cos they're falling apart and had to throw a lot of them away, so he brought me to buy a pair. But the shop with the shoe i was eyeing was closed for CNY. I had something planned for him... The clue was "It's something for you to see but not touch. Everyone will be able to see it and it's a public declaration. Might be embarrassing for you but more for me." Take a look at what it was:

Can you see what it is?

Nege en vyftig dae en ek kan nie wag vir dit nie verby is!

I hate weddings. They bring out the worst in people.

e il del giorno sessantunesimo è spuntato...

We're both waiting impatiently. Struggling to enjoy service to God during these last few days of singlehood while eagerly looking forward to starting a new kind of service together. It's all getting quite hectic trying to plan a wedding, do ministry, try and be around family, try to work all sorts of things out with each other... Tonight is gonna be our first marriage preparation session. I'm looking forward to that. We're using this book called "In the sight of God : Preparing to get married in church" by Gordon Cheng. It's only four short bible studies and some guidelines to help you plan your wedding ceremony etc. But i think there's more. I doubt there'll only be four studies. I read "Married for God" by Christopher Ash, "Sex, Romance and the glory of God" by CJ Mahaney, "Feminine Appeal" by Carolyn Mahaney, "When Sinners say I do" by i can't remember who and "Love that Lasts" by Gary and Betsy Riccuci. Good for all you who are single and married... that means they're good for all of you.

What a difference round corners make

Sorry about the erased out words. I'm not keen on having uninvited guests, especially since the guestlist has expanded beyond whatever i would have liked. But anyway, this post is about round corners. A pretty easy job, a little every day. I've finished cutting all the invitations myself so decided to put them together to see what they looked like but they didn't look quite complete. So i rounded the corners, and ta-dah! So much better.

sesenta e cinco días, dúas horas, vinte e un minutos e cuarenta segundos ata sábado, o décimo de abril de 2010, catro horas =)

It's been a hard couple of weeks for us two, culminating in some tearful arguments. It just reminds us how much work it is for two sinful people to say "I do." and to stay married. It also shows us that as much as we wish we could make it work, we just can't do it without the Gospel. There's no hope in our own efforts to stay married. It's so easy to be selfish and withdraw from the relationship. I know i want to throw in the towel sometimes. It's hard enough dealing with your own sinfulness, much more someone else's sinfulness. Anyway, that's whats called service to God and each other. Hard work, but we're better together.

There's no combination of words
I could put on the back of a postcard,
No song that I could sing
But I can try for your heart,
Our dreams, and they are made out of real things,
Like a shoebox of photographs,
With sepiatone loving,
Love is the answer
At least for most of the questions in my heart ,
Like why are we here? And where do we go?
And how come it's so hard?
It's not always easy,
And sometimes life can be deceiving,
I'll tell you one thing, its always better when we're together...
~Jack Johnson, in his song "Better together"

sixty-saith diwrnod...

and much has been accomplished, thanks to all the lovely people who turned up yesterday to help make my invitations. Curse ye the bride who wants ribbons on her invitations =P well, i was only expecting to make 150. It just blew out of proportion to 460, and that's not my fault! Don't blame the bride *grins*.

Anyway, still remaining is another 462 invitations to be cut, 110 ribbons to be tied, and 460 envelopes to be embellished. Yay! I'll have to do little by little every night just to make the deadline for Chinese New Year.

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Other than these annoying invites, we recently started a new series in church on Deuteronomy. It's interesting the fact that now i can actually see better the light of the great Gospel of Jesus Christ from the viewpoint of the Old Testament. It's pretty scary to know that the Holy God of the OT, is the same God in the New Testament, cos He really takes sin seriously. Obedience is necessary, because He is the One God, the Only God, there is no other. He is the one who has released us from slavery and made us His own treasured possession, from aliens and rebels to be His sons and daughters. Thank the Lord Almighty for Jesus, cos i don't think i could ever, EVER be holy on my own.

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Adrian, i like it when you comment!

soixante-huit jours...

I have bought all the cards i need to make my wedding invitations, after frequenting 5 different branches of Popular bookstore (i swear, i'm never going back there again) and Jusco. I have tried printing it with my laser printer but unfortunately it's not taking the textured paper too well. So i'm gonna try the trusty old inkjet in Adrian's house. I so need to get it all printed out so we can cut it at the DIY party! I saved a lot of money by doing it this long and lengthy way. Sigh, i hesitate to spend so much on cards that people will throw away after the wedding is done (except for freaks like me who will keep the ones she likes).

I've taken my sewing machine out of the box. That's as far as the progress goes on the wedding gown, hahaha.

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Tonight is the night of my DIY party! I think i'll have to go two rounds, cos i didn't manage to print one out of two pieces. So only half the invites are sorta ready to be cut. But thankfully, i still have things for people to do, like tie and glue ribbons!